Le Pouvier de la Guichetier -- A phrase usable in several settings that describes when someone in the company is stopping you in your tracks or attempting to waste your time on an assignment you view as unimportant. It translates from French as "The Power of the Clerk".
So you think you are some kind of important business person with lots of smarts, big contributions to provide and are growing in your position with the company. Then reality strikes when the determined paper shuffler in payroll or the crusty analyst that processes your expense reports stops all progress as their requirement is met.
Frequently a reaction to a long template sent by some lower level in the finance or legal or HR department that adds a burden to your workload right at a time when you are about to win that deal, or handle that customer issue or your usual daily job of saving the company.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Instead of Conversation
Why converse when a quick comment can tell the whole story. Yes a take off on "a picture is worth a thousand words" - a clever comment can make your point without a lengthy oratory or paragraph of explanation. Particularly useful in business settings where meetings tend to drag on incessantly or when tweeting or when you just want to move it along already. So in the spirit of moving it along already -- Instead of Conversation:
It won't get better with time -- useful when attempting to move along a discussion in several different settings. Whether it involves hearing more about a lackluster project or deciding about what to do with a problem employee -- often times there is reluctance or misguided hopefulness. Get over it. Stop dragging your feet when you just need to make some difficult decisions. In some cases you will gain some time in other cases perhaps help yourself by improving the talent that does most of your work. So end the attempt by the other person to drag on about the options or ideas and get them moved on to action with a quick conversation ender -- It Won't Get Better with Time.
No good can come from this -- A quick assessment in evaluating a course of action. You could offer a correction to the answer just given by your boss to his boss. But there are times to simply look at your shoes and keep your wisdom to yourself. A critical message for those who do not know how to prioritize their comments - in other words - for those who don't know when to just keep it to themselves. Or can be applied to attending meetings - some you are just better off missing - and know -- No Good Can Come From This.
Go Dead Bird - Offered to me as advice by a colleague for situations when you are in a no-win scenario. These are typically characterized by an interrogation from a boss that has to be the smartest guy in the room. Going dead bird relies upon the observation that when a bird and cat with sharp claws engage - the cat has to win and will continue to paw at the bird, despite the declining condition of the bird, until the bird is not moving, presumably dead -- and then and only then will the cat lose interest and move on. When facing an opponent in a meeting and whatever you offer is struck down or ridiculed followed by a peppering of further questions -- simply go dead bird.
What am I missing? -- A brief way of conveying that you believe what has just been presented to you lacks an string of logic that would make it useful. Brings quick levels of insecurity to the presenter and generally causes them to realize they have not fully thought out their content and any conclusion.
Is that right? -- An amazingly powerful conversation management tool. Use when you want to respond but not take a position on what has been said. In this case, along with a few others, it is not just the words - it is the tone and voice inflection. Practice, Practice, Practice. Then use with care.
Tell the Story, Don't be the Story -- Wiser words may have never been spoken. You must appreciate the full depth of what is being said. This essentially is a lesson in life - many of the things your mother tried to teach you. Be the one talking about the drunk that fell in the pool, don't be the one everyone is talking about the next day -- the guy that did a half-gainer into the the pool with all of his clothes on yelling, "Yo dude - look at me I can fly!" It is also a way of summarizing a great deal of conversation, advice, and reaction to someone telling you about something stupid they saw or something stupid they did.
Work is Therapy -- After listening to your colleague whine on an on about the lack of direction, pointless assignments, incompetent management, doomed future of the company you work it becomes time to get back to all of those pointless assignments that have an approaching deadline. You want to give the advice -- you should just do your job and stop pissing away so much time focused on stuff you can't control. And even if all of what they say is true, better to bury yourself in mindless work than spend the whole day driving yourself crazy thinking about the lack of future you find yourself in. Do your work - it is therapy from thinking.
Why me Work? -- A phrase to be used by a member of the management team when they find they are engaged in a conversation with their self. If you are a leader and one day find your doing some work, you need to stop immediately and question to your self, why have you fallen to this level at this stage in your career. You could go on for a while trying to logic your way out of this unacceptable situation including some amount of wondering about the talent of your team, or attempting some justification on your assessment of the difficulty of the work you are performing or you can just get down to the core issue and start questioning your delegation skills -- simply stop it and get some underling in to do your work and get back to the more important task of choosing which projects to put your name on. Why should you work?
Tell me about your day and don't leave out any details -- For use at home when tired. Whether you are arriving home exhausted from another stressful day or are the one greeting your spouse after a full day of chasing rug rats and can't wait for a nap - it works for both. Best applied after snuggling up to your loved one or laying your head on a comfy couch pillow and just before you are about to drift peacefully away - ask your spouse to spare no detail in a description of their day.
Embrace the Lull -- Everyone has heard about the early bird getting the worm, how hard work pays off, work hard everyday and it will pay off. So sure those are good things to pursue. But life is funny and work is even funnier. There will come times in your working life when there is simply a lull -- you are between big projects, you are awaiting another group to finish a part before you can move forward, your supervisor is out of the country for 2 weeks and didn't send the files you were supposed to help with -- whatever -- it is a lull. Do you worry about what to do, do you question if you should invent projects to fill in the time, or do you fully embrace this glorious gift. Goof off -- this doesn't happen often. Embrace the lull.
It won't get better with time -- useful when attempting to move along a discussion in several different settings. Whether it involves hearing more about a lackluster project or deciding about what to do with a problem employee -- often times there is reluctance or misguided hopefulness. Get over it. Stop dragging your feet when you just need to make some difficult decisions. In some cases you will gain some time in other cases perhaps help yourself by improving the talent that does most of your work. So end the attempt by the other person to drag on about the options or ideas and get them moved on to action with a quick conversation ender -- It Won't Get Better with Time.
No good can come from this -- A quick assessment in evaluating a course of action. You could offer a correction to the answer just given by your boss to his boss. But there are times to simply look at your shoes and keep your wisdom to yourself. A critical message for those who do not know how to prioritize their comments - in other words - for those who don't know when to just keep it to themselves. Or can be applied to attending meetings - some you are just better off missing - and know -- No Good Can Come From This.
Go Dead Bird - Offered to me as advice by a colleague for situations when you are in a no-win scenario. These are typically characterized by an interrogation from a boss that has to be the smartest guy in the room. Going dead bird relies upon the observation that when a bird and cat with sharp claws engage - the cat has to win and will continue to paw at the bird, despite the declining condition of the bird, until the bird is not moving, presumably dead -- and then and only then will the cat lose interest and move on. When facing an opponent in a meeting and whatever you offer is struck down or ridiculed followed by a peppering of further questions -- simply go dead bird.
What am I missing? -- A brief way of conveying that you believe what has just been presented to you lacks an string of logic that would make it useful. Brings quick levels of insecurity to the presenter and generally causes them to realize they have not fully thought out their content and any conclusion.
Is that right? -- An amazingly powerful conversation management tool. Use when you want to respond but not take a position on what has been said. In this case, along with a few others, it is not just the words - it is the tone and voice inflection. Practice, Practice, Practice. Then use with care.
Tell the Story, Don't be the Story -- Wiser words may have never been spoken. You must appreciate the full depth of what is being said. This essentially is a lesson in life - many of the things your mother tried to teach you. Be the one talking about the drunk that fell in the pool, don't be the one everyone is talking about the next day -- the guy that did a half-gainer into the the pool with all of his clothes on yelling, "Yo dude - look at me I can fly!" It is also a way of summarizing a great deal of conversation, advice, and reaction to someone telling you about something stupid they saw or something stupid they did.
Work is Therapy -- After listening to your colleague whine on an on about the lack of direction, pointless assignments, incompetent management, doomed future of the company you work it becomes time to get back to all of those pointless assignments that have an approaching deadline. You want to give the advice -- you should just do your job and stop pissing away so much time focused on stuff you can't control. And even if all of what they say is true, better to bury yourself in mindless work than spend the whole day driving yourself crazy thinking about the lack of future you find yourself in. Do your work - it is therapy from thinking.
Why me Work? -- A phrase to be used by a member of the management team when they find they are engaged in a conversation with their self. If you are a leader and one day find your doing some work, you need to stop immediately and question to your self, why have you fallen to this level at this stage in your career. You could go on for a while trying to logic your way out of this unacceptable situation including some amount of wondering about the talent of your team, or attempting some justification on your assessment of the difficulty of the work you are performing or you can just get down to the core issue and start questioning your delegation skills -- simply stop it and get some underling in to do your work and get back to the more important task of choosing which projects to put your name on. Why should you work?
Tell me about your day and don't leave out any details -- For use at home when tired. Whether you are arriving home exhausted from another stressful day or are the one greeting your spouse after a full day of chasing rug rats and can't wait for a nap - it works for both. Best applied after snuggling up to your loved one or laying your head on a comfy couch pillow and just before you are about to drift peacefully away - ask your spouse to spare no detail in a description of their day.
Embrace the Lull -- Everyone has heard about the early bird getting the worm, how hard work pays off, work hard everyday and it will pay off. So sure those are good things to pursue. But life is funny and work is even funnier. There will come times in your working life when there is simply a lull -- you are between big projects, you are awaiting another group to finish a part before you can move forward, your supervisor is out of the country for 2 weeks and didn't send the files you were supposed to help with -- whatever -- it is a lull. Do you worry about what to do, do you question if you should invent projects to fill in the time, or do you fully embrace this glorious gift. Goof off -- this doesn't happen often. Embrace the lull.
Next time just go mow your yard -- A short hand way of telling a support person who has just produced a worthless analysis that the time they spent on the analysis was of equal value to them going home and mowing their yard. Helps keep it in perspective.
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Dear Fans, Thanks for reading. Would be interested in your comments but please keep in mind that I don't take criticism well so please only offer kind and supportive comments.
Coming Attractions:
A Cancelled Meeting is the Greatest Gift of All --
Life Happens in 15 Second Moments --
Auto Pilot Answer
In Life You Are Allocated Only So Many Words and Then You Run Out
Train Your Bowels
Can You Write That Up for Me?
To Conceptualize is Better Than to Do
We're Doomed
How Do You Feel About Caring for Old People?
It is an IQ Test
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Fans, Thanks for reading. Would be interested in your comments but please keep in mind that I don't take criticism well so please only offer kind and supportive comments.
Coming Attractions:
A Cancelled Meeting is the Greatest Gift of All --
Life Happens in 15 Second Moments --
Auto Pilot Answer
In Life You Are Allocated Only So Many Words and Then You Run Out
Train Your Bowels
Can You Write That Up for Me?
To Conceptualize is Better Than to Do
We're Doomed
How Do You Feel About Caring for Old People?
It is an IQ Test
If there was no need to pee there would be no end to meetings
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